10,000 hours. Apparently this study in the 1930’s declared, “to deliberately undertake a skill for 10,000 hours is what it takes to be an ‘expert,'” whatever that is. Well, regardless of the inherent talent or permanence of a skill in a man, 10,000 hours probably means that you’ve done something more than most other people on the planet, so you’re likely to be better at it. Or at least know more about the details of “it.”
So, I have been practicing the art of never saying “I can” or “I can’t.” I just do it. If you ask me to do something, I will answer honestly. But in reality, “doing” something is rarely that simple. Not that I want to completely deconstruct everything you do all day, but “doing something” let’s say, swimming, is a continuum — we start out dabbling in the water. We move on to being unafraid of getting our heads wet, and on and on until we learn some swimming strokes, either by experimentation or because someone helped us along to get better and better. At what point did I go from “I can’t” to “I can?” My answer is that I never did. I was always on the continuum of what I was able to do, based on my history, my point in life, my fears and doubts, and my overcoming those.
Now, change the questions to be more specific, “Can you swim 100 meters?” And the answer becomes a simple “yes” or “no.”
It’s the difference between a mentality that is moving forward and enjoying the current state and one that either defeats itself or feeds bravado or pride.
So there are some things to which I would say, “no, I haven’t tried that,” but not much within the realm of human possibility that I would say, “I can’t.” Because I actually don’t know the answer to that, I just haven’t starting doing it yet.
And getting rid of “I can’t” gets rid of a myriad of destructive self-talk that I used to engage with. “I can’t take this any more.” Well, that’s just plain the wrong thing to say if it’s the right, best, or true thing to do. Now I reach the precipice of the thing I’ve not done before (ahem, blogging), take a deep breath, and do it.