Mommy is Like a Volcano

After 9 stressful years, 2 high-stress months, and 3 uber stressful weeks in the Morrison household, I had a pretty good week. So I don’t want to give you the impression that the last 9 years (inclusive of 2 months and 3 weeks) haven’t been good in general. But what I really mean by “pretty good” is that I smiled a lot and didn’t shout at the children or didn’t curse under my breath all week. Well, until tonight. Why, oh why?

Because mommy is like a volcano.

In italics, I present to you several facts about volcanoes borrowed from dosomething.org:

• A volcano is a mountain that opens downward to a pool of molten rock below the surface of the earth. When pressure builds up, eruptions occur.
  Mommies are complex people. All kinds of stuff bubbling there under the surface. And it feels exactly like molten rock.Some volcanoes just ooze their magma into the ocean in a peaceful *hissssss* where the waves of the ever-changing shore rhythmically camouflage their creative energy. But . . .
• In an eruption, gases and rock shoot up through the opening and spill over or fill the air with lava fragments. Eruptions can cause lava flows, hot ash flows, mudslides, avalanches, falling ash and floods.
  Pent up frustration not discharged or adequately dispositioned continuously leads to pressure. Which leads to eruptions. Doesn’t it feel like that? Audible sighs give way to muttering which gives way to shouting, filling the air with verbal lava fragments. No, the little people did not know that the lava was under there. All they normally see is a peaceful cone flanked with fertile soil.
• The danger area around a volcano covers about a 20-mile radius.
  Beware, children in the other room.
• • An erupting volcano can trigger tsunamis, flash floods, earthquakes, mudflows and rockfalls.
    You remember Mount Saint Helens? Vesuvius? Those don’t hold a candle to the 1816 Mt. Tambora eruption in Indonesia. That death toll was estimated at 92,000, not including those who died from CROP FAILURE due to the endless winter caused by volcanic ash in the atmosphere. In the same way, a particularly hazardous and violent eruption of the mommy can have far reaching consequences . . . even to generations.
  • More than 80% of the earth’s surface is volcanic in origin. The sea floor and some mountains were formed by countless volcanic eruptions. Gaseous emissions from volcano formed the earth’s atmosphere.
    So maybe there are 20% of you mommies out there who aren’t volcanic. Hmmmph.
  • The sound of an eruption volcano can be quiet and hissing or explosive and booming. The loud cracks travel hundreds of miles and do the most damage, including hearing loss and broken glass.
    Hmm. No comment.

  Fellow mommies, we can’t always predict or control our eruptions, but we can be aware that the creative energy that makes land (!) also has a lot of potential energy for destruction.  Let’s keep the pressure low and take life a little more slowly so we can vent constructively.

  Do you have any tips for how to avoid volcanic mommy eruptions?